Jobs, Storms and Greencards.

So, most people reading this will probably already know that I managed to find a job. I started in the last week of September and I seem to be pretty good at it so far. The job is in call centre customer service, which I seem to be unable to escape, for a Health and Benefits Outsourcing company. That might bear some explanation for my NZ friends and family so here goes: the company basically takes the work from HR departments of other companies (outsourcing the work but not off-shoring it - as Mitt Romney likes to point out) to manage the benefits that the employers offer. One cannot survive long in the US without medical, dental, vision, long and short term disability and probably a number of other insurances. Employers here tend to offer these benefits to employees at a lower rate than they could purchase them on their own - known as group policies because the insurer gives a discount since it's expected to be bulk coverage - and also subsidise the premiums heavily - usually around 70-80% from what I've seen of good employers.

I like the job, it's interesting and it's certainly teaching me important skills to do with dealing with insurance carriers and understanding benefits that I would never ever had needed in New Zealand, but there is one problem. Well, perhaps 2, really. It's only a temporary job, to start with, so I don't have the stability I need to move out on my own with my husband. This time of year is known as "Open Enrollment" for the insurance industry and it's when most employers allow their employees to make changes to their benefits. They usually can't make changes any other time or year unless they have something major happen they they get married, have a child, get divorced and so forth. So, as you can imagine, it's a very busy time of year. The company I am temping for hired about 200 extra employees for this season and they won't have work for all of them once the season is over. That means that some people will be out of a job come January 31 of 2013.

The other problem is that it doesn't pay well enough for me to be able to support my husband as the main (if not technically quite sole) breadwinner. It doesn't offer employer subsidised group insurance at all unless I get "converted", as they call it, to permanent employment. I don't even know what hourly rate I would be offered if they wanted me to convert or if I would even get a pay rise except for being offered benefits. So much uncertainty.

To top it all off: my in-law just lost his job because the contract, which was meant to be for 3 years, ended due to the research project he was hired for being cancelled. So he has less resources and is stressed and taking it out on us by expecting us to pay for everything we need - which, as mentioned previously, we cannot afford to do. I'm trying to save up so that we can purchase our own car and pay for a deposit on an apartment and all that expensive stuff. The sooner I can do those things then the sooner he can sell his house and move closer to work opportunities and the entertainment that he enjoys. I guess it's hard to see the medium and long term when money is tight and you're not feeling very reasonable.

You may also have heard of Hurricane (or tropical storm as she was down-graded to) Sandy. She passed this way and I was forced to stay overnight away from home in a hotel paid for by my employer. It wasn't too bad as it was a nice hotel. I had to share the room with a co-worker but she was really nice and into RPing and LARPing so it was a nice evening. I sort of want to be friends with her now but I'm not sure how to approach her. I don't even know where she sits at work because the place is a maze of cubicles that I still get lost in occasionally. At home during the storm the power stayed steady and no damage to the house or people was sustained. Many are still without power in New York and New Jersey so we were very lucky that it we just got an edge of it and not the full force.

Lastly, my greencard arrived unexpectedly last week. I was expecting to have to apply for another work authorisation card since mine was only good until April 2013 and the processing time for greencards at the California immigration services (where my application was moved to expedite it, apparently) was 16 months when I last checked so that would have put me at July 2013 before I received my greencard. And I wasn't even certain if they were going to request a second interview here in the US, as they are entitled to do, so I really wasn't expecting it to arrive so soon. Still, one less thing to worry about it always good. So, as of October 2012 I am officially a conditional permanent resident of the United States of America for 2 years. Complicated, huh? Well, once the 2 years is almost up (90 days before it is up, in fact) I will be required to apply to have my conditional residency removed if I wish to remain in residence in the US of A. Then, after 3 years of continuous residence in the US (and if I meet a list of other requirements like still being married to a US citizen, having lived with him the whole 3 years and having been present in the US continuously for 18 months prior to applying, to name a few) I can apply for Naturalisation to become a US Citizen.

At first when I was considering moving here I thought that I would never want to be a US Citizen. And I still don't, really, if I have to be honest about it. But there are downsides to being only a permanent resident. Such as: if I leave the US for more than a year they can refuse to let me back in. They can also refuse to let me back in for any reason at all, if they so choose, and they don't even have to tell me why. That uncertainty really sucks. There are downsides to being a US Citizen too. Becoming a target for Anti-US forces (paranoid, huh?), having to file tax returns in the US for the rest of my life even if I don't live there and being targeted by the nasty and big dollar political industry as a potential voter. That last one really gets my gall because I feel like Abby from youtube (If you haven't seen the "Tired of Broco Bamma and Mitt Romney" video on Elizabeth Evans' channel, you should) and I'm not even targeted by all the ads, volunteers, cold callers and flyers that SuperPACs and campaigns are sending out. I really do feel badly for the voters of the US.

Well, if anything else interesting happens then I'll try to update. I'm so homesick it's not even funny. Keep NZ warm (figuratively speaking) for me, guys! I'll be home as soon as I can. I think even husband is sick of the US now. He's even said he could put up with Wellington's earthquakes and he was not as all tolerant of them previously so it's a good sign. Now, just to figure out how to afford to return. Put your thinking caps on and let me know if you have any brilliant ideas that are within the law.

I miss you guys!

~Be

P.S. I have my driver's license now also. I have to get it before I could really start applying for jobs in earnest as driving is really the only reliable way to get around here with jobs 20+ miles away.

Against My Better Judgement

Every time I tell someone that I am in the process of emigrating to the USA I am invariably asked: "Why?" This isn't just by my fellow Kiwis, by the way. I was asked this by fiance's therapist, his physician, his medication doctor, his father and his minister - all of whom are US Citizens. If, they say, we have more friends, family, social opportunity, access to all the benefits of an international city, public transportation and job opportunities in New Zealand then why are we going to live in the US?

The answer is that fiance isn't in a place in his life where he would be able to emigrate to NZ. His mother passed away in January, he has yet to have his first permanent paying job, he's not yet financially independent and he wouldn't be able to prove to NZ immigration that he wouldn't become a burden to the state. I, also, am not in any state to take on the role of being his financial support. I am not currently employed (though if I weren't leaving NZ in less than a week I'm sure I could quickly rectify that situation), I don't have any savings and I do have a sizeable student loan debt. Clearly, I could not convince the NZ government that I would be able to support him since I'm not even supporting myself at this moment in time.

I know that this is our only option, at present, if we want to be together physically in the same location for an extended period of time. But even though I know all of this; something feels amiss.

I thought that I would be relieved and happy once I had the fiancee visa in hand and knew for certain what direction my life was going to take from this point forward. Instead I feel that I am going against every logical thought and subconscious instinct for survival that I have ever been taught or picked up in my short life-time so far. It was quietly disconcerting to be constantly asked why on earth I would even contemplate moving to live in a place that many people I know don't even want to visit - let alone live - but I managed to brush it off and people seemed to understand when I explained the situation to them. But now it just seems to be more evidence to give credence to the feeling that I am making a catastrophic mistake.

I've met at least half a dozen US born NZ residents who said that it was their dream to live in New Zealand and now that they are here it is all they ever wanted and more. I honestly cannot imagine saying that about the US at any point in time. Much of the social sentiment there that is portrayed in the slanted media is diametrically opposed to all my personal feelings and beliefs. Even our slanted media here in NZ is not as far fetched. It's undeniable that the US has more crime, poorer primary and secondary education (1-12 grade), more expensive tertiary (college) education and is much more of a political target for international crime such as terrorism than tiny, relatively unimportant NZ. As an example: the Global Peace Index of 2011 puts NZ at 2 (the lower the more peaceful) just after Iceland who took the number 1 spot and the USA is at 82 - 2 points higher than The People's Republic of China at 80. Minimum wage in Massachusetts is lower than NZ minimum wage (even after converting the currency) and worker's rights are poorer from what I have researched.

Don't get me wrong; NZ is far from perfect. But I do, in some respects, acknowledge the fact that I am down-grading. In other areas I am upgrading - I may be able to make more money there simply because US dollars are worth more. But I may find that I need a Bachelor of the Arts degree, at the very least, to make the sort of money I would need to offset the increased cost of living. Getting that degree, without government aid which I won't likely be entitled to while a mere resident, will be a lot more costly and likely more difficult. I may also need a minimum wage job to begin with to gain a local referee for my resume.

I guess the moral of the story is that I don't really know what I am doing. I'm just throwing my cards into the wind and hoping that some of them will turn up Aces. Looking back at April of 2011 I seemed to be a lot more zen about it than I feel right now. Here's a quote from a tongue in cheek FAQ that I wrote up for my friends and family to read:

"Q. Aren't you worried about [insert stereotype of US culture here]?!"

"A. Not really.  With common sense and awareness of my surroundings I think I can keep myself out of trouble.  Like attracts like, I believe, so if I'm calm and reasonable then likely those around me will be too."

I guess my problem at the moment is that I don't feel calm or reasonable. I'd better do some meditation before I get to that TSA check-point in Los Angeles.